perplexme | Forty-Eighth Keychain-[Written]

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Forty-Eighth Keychain-[Written]

[Filtered From Hayner]

So let's say that someone recently showed up in this place, but they're from a time where they remember you differently. How can you tell them about how things are in the future without ruining everything? And this isn't just a "oh I moved away" sort of difference, this is something a lot bigger...like memories.

[/Filter]

727 days. Nearly two years, and I still don't see any signs of me going home anytime soon. Should I consider that a good thing or a bad thing? For those of you who have been here that long, what do you think?

Oh, hey. Hayner! I'm thinking since you're new here ~~and your sense of direction stinks still~~, we should probably explore Luceti some more so you get familiar with it. What do you think? Later today?

[Filter to Xion]

Hey. I think we need to talk.

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Surprisingly? It went better than most of my conversations with him, but it was really weird. Not just kind of weird, very weird.

[ considering how poorly her own conversation with him went, Xion doesn't really react to that. ] Weird how?

Weird in the way that he actually told me that I was right about everything? I'm not sure if I believe him...I told him I didn't believe him entirely. But he was going on about understanding it now and how he didn't before.

[ Xion is silent for a moment, looking out over the view and taking a bit of her ice cream as she thinks. ] ... he keeps saying that, yeah. He told me he doesn't want the Keyblade anymore. [ another pause. ] I don't know exactly what he went through at home, but he has that sword now... the one he had when the Organization found out about him. It's nice if he could let the Keyblade go, but I just... [ am not ready to deal with it yet? don't totally believe him? Xion just trails off. ]

...that's why I wanted to talk to you. I don't trust him, especially after what he said and did to you.

As for what he went through...hard to say. Naminé would know if she were here, but Sora doesn't remember. [There's a pause though as he just glances at her.] The Soul Eater thing? Really? I haven't seen him yet, I just talked to him. It's just...like I said, I'm not sure I believe him just yet. Wanted to know what you thought.

... the thing is, I don't know if I trust him, either. I want to, but...

[ a sigh. ] Soul Eater? Is that its name? I guess that's it. [ she looks at him, biting her lip, then glances away again, ice cream temporarily forgotten. ] ... I wish he'd just give me space to think, but he keeps asking to talk to me. He seems like he feels really bad, but ... I can't just go back to the way things were before. If he could prove he was trustworthy, somehow...

I think so. Sora would know.

Anyway...he's been asking people about betrayal and how to fix it and make up for it. Pretty sure it's because of you. [Ear scritch for Nea.] Have you told him to go away? Because I could probably tell him to go away for a while. I already told him I only trust him about seventy-five percent right now.

He what? [ Xion did not know that. Her eyebrows knit and she looks away. When had he...? And not told her. But why would he tell her when...?

Ugh. Not even sure how to feel about that, Xion's just quiet for a moment. ] ... no, I haven't. I don't want him to go away, I just... I just wish there was an easy way to fix all of this, even though I know there's not. [ takes a bite out of her melting ice cream. ] ... I don't know anymore, Roxas. I don't know what I want, or what I really think of him.

I think it was probably filtered from you...sorry. [Other than not really because he's pretty sure Xion needed to know. He sighs deeply and shakes his head.] Love's stupid anyway. [Ice cream is melting and so he's going to eat it while he thinks this over.]

The other part is that Riku has a heart...we don't. Wonder if he remembers that feelings are different for us. [But scooting closer because he actually feels like being sort of supportive, though there's a grunt when Nea digs claws into his leg from the movement.] Ow. I think...you just need to stop thinking about it. Sure I can't tell him just to go away for a while anyway?

... don't apologize. I can understand why. [ she had something of her own to filter, not long ago. ] ... love's not stupid. It's just harder than I thought it would be.

[ she just licks at her dwindling ice cream quietly while she listens to him speak after that. truthfully, she's not sure her feelings are different -- jury's still out on if she has a heart -- but she doesn't say that. she smiles a little when he moves closer. ] ... I'm sure. I think he gets the idea... and if I have to, I can tell him to go away on my own. It's hard not to think about it, though. It's practically all that's on my mind, lately.

Maybe stupid's the wrong word for it, but it's weird to think about, you know? I've seen a lot of people in love here, and I still don't exactly get it.

[You would get a hug if Roxas felt like that was necessary, just so you know. Instead, he's coddling his kitten and just listening.] He kind of does, maybe. It's not going to be easier for us though. Did you hear Sora's last announcement about the house?

... [ Xion presses her free hand to her chest, idly. ] You know... even now, I'm not sure I get it either. It's pretty confusing.

[ oof. that. nodnod. ] Yeah. I kind of like the idea, actually, but ... I'm not sure how well it would work out right now. [ a beat. ] And I still have to meet Hayner.

But do you want to get it? I don't know if I do.

I like the idea, but...["Axel and I both don't want you near jerkface Riku."] It might get complicated. [There's a pause though because fjkdsa Haynerrrr.] Hayner...it's complicated, too. He doesn't know about us being Nobodies.

... I think I would, maybe. It sounds nice.

[ finishing off her ice cream now, one moment. ] ... I guess it could, but ... I think things would work out. At least, I hope they would. [ glances at him. ] ... how do you know him, anyway?

...let me know how that goes then.

[He shrugs a little, nodding in agreement. Sure, maybe things will work out. But FJDLSA PANIC A BIT. UH.] Um...well...it's kind of a funny story. A funny and long story about what happened after I left the Organization for good.

[ why so panicked, bff. Xion just blinks at him. ] Well ... I've got time.

[because it means telling you things, fffff] Okay...okay so, here's what happened. [Nea gets pettings while Roxas finishes his ice cream to start the story.] After everything that happened with you, I had this idea in mind...you know, to free Kingdom Hearts and stop all of the craziness. I guess I thought that if I freed it, you'd come back and everything could go back to the way it was. Just you, me, and Axel. I was going to head back but I ended up getting stopped by a bunch of the Neoshadows. They all just came out of nowhere and I had to fight them. By that point I had the two Keyblades. I wasn't entirely sure why at the time, but like I cared. There were just too many of them though.

...that's the first time I met Riku. He helped me fight off the Heartless but after that? We ended up fighting each other. He had Oblivion because I gave it to him, but I fought him and I beat him. Then Riku decided to be a dirty cheater and changed his appearance and then he disappeared but came back and then something happened and I blacked out.

...anyway. After that? I guess Riku brought me to this guy named DiZ. Or DiZ came after me after that, I don't remember that part well enough anymore. DiZ decided that he had to hide me because the Organization was looking for me, but he wanted to use me to make Sora wake up. So he created this virtual version of Twilight Town...and that's how I met Hayner, Pence, and Olette. I didn't know any better and so I just went on with my life. My memories had been rescrambled, I didn't remember anything about the Organization or anything. I thought I'd grown up in Twilight Town with those guys. I thought I was normal...sort of. When I was there? I started having these weird dreams. I didn't know it at the time, but they were Sora's memories as Naminé started to fix everything. The Nobodies started coming after me, and sometimes I could summon the Keyblade but I didn't know why.

Axel even came after me a few times, but I couldn't remember him either. It...was awful, now that I think about it. For him, I mean. We thought we'd always remember each other, but I didn't remember anything. All of this happened within one week. Axel and I fought a couple of times. I remember I tried talking to Naminé once? I ended up with Kairi instead. That's when I started to figure out what was going on.

Naminé's the one who eventually told me that I was Sora's Nobody. She's the one who told mewhat was happening to me, and I learned that everything was fake. Everything was a lie. I wasn't really friends with Hayner, Pence, and Olette. They were just...data. Nothing else. I started remembering everything, and I guess it just...hurt. I was mad. More than mad.

I fought Axel one more time before I found Sora, and I beat him. He seemed surprised I had two Keyblades, even though it wasn't weird to me anymore. I kind of wanted to follow him, but I couldn't. I had to find Sora. I found DiZ instead. [And here he pauses, visibly angry all over again. Man, even years later and knowing everything he knows, DiZ still pisses him off.]

DiZ...was just a hologram and eventually he left. I found Sora...and I rejoined him.

After I rejoined Sora's body, everything went back to normal for him, I guess. He went to Twilight Town and he met the real Hayner, Pence, and Olette. Kairi's met them too, but the Hayner that's here? He doesn't know them. He knows me. That means...it means he's not real. I don't know how to tell him that either. [Don't mind him, he's just going to stop talking now because wow that's a lot.]

[ Xion is a good audience for this monologue. She just watches him and listens quietly, placing her ice cream stick down on the edge of the roof. She reacts to different things in the story -- her expression turning to shock and sadness, variably, as he describes how he fought Riku and then lost all his memories, even those of Axel. But she doesn't speak until a moment or two after he's gone quiet, taking some time to process that. ]

... I missed so many things ... I'm so sorry you went through all of that, Roxas. [ a sigh. ] But as for Hayner... it sounds like it's going to be pretty complicated, no matter what. Even the truth would probably sound unbelievable...

[Petting the kitten, ignoring mostly everything else because he kind of does not like telling that story.]

Not your fault...I know I have to tell him eventually, but what am I even supposed to say? I ran into the same problem when Olette was here, but I avoided the subject for a long time. Hayner's not going to take it easy at all.

... I don't really know what to tell you, but ... I can be there when you talk to him, if that would make it easier. [ she wants to support her friend somehow. ): ]

Maybe. I dunno. ...have you talked to him yet?

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Forty-Eighth Keychain-[Written]

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